Woman Gains Weight. Trainer Is a Nimrod.

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I’ve heard a lot of asinine stuff in my time. My short list includes:

1. High protein diets will make your kidneys explode.

2. Protein powder will kill you (note to readers: as promised, I’ll be writing about protein powder supplements later this week).

3. One’s knees should never project over their toes will exercising.

4. Christian Slater is totally believable as a tough as nails multilingual operative who kicks major ass in the show My Own Worst Enemy. Two words: show canceled, bitches. Okay, that was three words. Whatever.

I thought I heard it all. That is till last week, when I received an e-mail from a female client of mine. Long story short, she’s a distance coaching client and was just checking in to fill me in on her progress. She also mentioned to me that she finally got her sister to start training and that she was making great progress as well; to the tune of five lbs of muscle gain while LOSING roughly five inches off her waist. Awesome. Here’s what my client’s sister’s trainer (I think that makes sense) had to say about her weight gain. Warning: your brain may actually hate you for what you’re about to read.

“……although some of that is muscle, you also have to take into account that when you gain muscle and get in shape, your blood actually will weigh more because it’s more highly oxygenated.”

(CRICKETS CHIRPING)

Wow. If that’s not a nuclear bomb of bullshit sauce, then I don’t know what is. Is this guy serious? I’ve put a great deal of thought into how I would respond to this statement (3 seconds), and here it is.

He does realize that women lose blood every month when they menstruate, right? He also realizes that the more muscle one has, the more glycogen they can store, right? As well, he must understand that oxygen doesn’t weigh freakin five pounds! Surely, that’s just common sense, correct? I understand that he wasn’t saying that the highly oxygenated blood accounted for all of her weight gain. But to suggest that it accounted for even the slightest bit of weight gain (or anything significant) is downright absurd. I mean, he could have said something completely looney, like, adding Unicorn tears to my mom’s lasagna will make it carb-free, and I’d believe that over the crap he mentioned above.

That being said, lets open up the floodgates. I’m sure many of you have some “what tha……..is (s)he serious?” stories. Feel free to share them below. This should be fun.

Did what you just read make your day? Ruin it? Either way, you should share it with your friends and/or comment below.

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