Katie: This is Why Pete Was Ten Minutes Late to His B-Day Dinner.
Note to Reader: Katie = Pete’s girlfriend. Pete = Vice President of Cressey Performance. Pete’s birthday was this past Wednesday, but as many of you may recall, Wednesday also serves as the day when Singer shows up for his weekly 300 lb bench fail. Long story short, Katie made romantic b-day dinner reservations in the North End that night, but as soon as Singer showed up for what would mount to his 47th straight week (only a slight exaggeration) of pwnage, Pete knew that he wasn’t going anywhere. In short, he was playing with fire.
Needless to say, Katie, if you’re reading – this is why Pete was late. I’m sure you’ll understand.
A few things:
1. I haven’t seen a better hype guy since Puffy, circa 1994. Nice job Matt Blake!
2. I can’t confirm this with any scientific research or anything, but having a pure bred German Shepard from the Czech Republic (Argos) sitting there in the background automatically increases testosterone levels by 245%.
3. Singer is single. Ladies?
4. Goddammit, I’ve watched this video like twelve times this morning and all I want to do is pick up my desk and throw it out the window. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.