Morning Cup of Vomiting in My Mouth: Worst Diet Advice, Ever?

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Haven’t done one of these in I don’t know how long.  This one’s a doozy.

New York, New York:

Not that this is going to come as any surprise, but a plastic surgeon and an orthodontist (huh?) have recently teamed up to promote an extreme weight loss plan that involves daily injections of the pregnancy hormone hCG in conjunction with a 500-calorie per day diet.  Of course they would!

Here’s the basic logic (from the story linked above):  despite the fact that there’s absolutely no scientific research that it actually does anything, you tell people to inject themselves with this hormone (which coincidentally isn’t cheap) so that they won’t feel hungry when they’re only eating 500 calories per day.

What the shit!?!?!?!

I don’t know about you, but I’d like to see the percentage of people who actually keep the weight off once they stop “treatment.”

My guess is not many.

Moreover, I’d love to be a fly on the wall as this soul-less, asshat of a doctor explains to people that following a 500-calorie per day diet, long-term, is in any way healthy.  Why not just tell them to drink battery acid and eat paint chips?  Surely they’ll lose some weight that way, too.

I really don’t know how these people sleep at night.  Hey, anything to pay off that BMW and fake tan, right?

And, I don’t care what anyone says, despite their claims to the contrary, the reason why they’ve never lost any weight (even though they’ve tried everything) is because they crush Dunkin Donuts like it’s their job and their idea of exercise is taking the elevator to the second floor.

People don’t like to be held accountable for their own actions.   It’s well established in the research that people vastly UNDER-report how much they really eat, and OVER-report how much they actually exercise.  We’re not honest with ourselves.

It’s pretty amazing how many people out there follow a “strict” and “clean” diet (supposedly) and run a marathon before breakfast everyday (supposedly); yet, low and behold, they’re still 40 lbs overweight.

Simply put, we’re just not as active as we think we are.  Sadly, for many, their ONLY form of exercise is the 3-5 hours per week they spend in the gym – and, that’s assuming that when they go to the gym, they’re actually exercising.

Think about it:  THREE hours of exercise per week.

While there are exceptions to the rule – more often than not, that’s not going to cut it (particularly when things like yoga, elliptical trainers, and pink dumbbells are the staple for most people).  We’ve all seen the infomercials selling exercise machines that promise the body of our dreams with only three, twenty-minute sessions per week.  Yeah, right.  And I’m going to drive over to Brittney Daniel’s house in my tank and take her out to T.G.I.Friday for dinner tonight.

In your dreams!

Listen, most people watch three hours of television before bed every night; so you’re kidding yourself if you think your Pilates class you take three times per week is going to do anything.  Even still, like I said, most people aren’t moving around as much as I they think in the first place.  Something’s better than nothing, but lets be real here.  What’s more, as my good friend Mark Young has noted repeatedly, if we’re talking strictly caloric deficit and it’s effect on weight loss, exercise takes a back seat to diet anyways.

Which brings us back to Dr. McDouchington.  Really?  You’re going to tell me that you have your patient’s best interests in mind by telling them to stick a syringe in their body and inject a hormone that 1) isn’t even being used for its intended purpose and 2) has no proof that it even works other than a few suspect studies?  On top of that, you’re then going to advocate they eat only 500 calories per day?

Excuse me while I go throw an ax into my face.

I’d love to hear what all of you have to say.  Do you find this just as absurd as I do?

Did what you just read make your day? Ruin it? Either way, you should share it with your friends and/or comment below.

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Comments for This Entry

  • Michael Gray

    Yes...yes I do find it as absurd as you do. And it really pisses me off that I have intelligent clients asking me about this diet as if it's a viable option. There's no way that these ra-tards have anyones best interest in mind except their own. By the way, I've missed your morning vomiting...wait, what?

    March 10, 2011 at 6:11 am | Reply to this comment

  • ano

    I agree with you, Tony..the worst diet advice i have ever heard

    March 10, 2011 at 6:16 am | Reply to this comment

  • John

    The business of weight loss is where its at money wise. NYC (and its burbs) has way too many fat folks who are too busy and have cash to burn on who knows what. And truth be told, for years Dr's would hand out 'speed' to promote weight loss as an appetite suppressent as long as you showed up once a month for a 'check up'. The FDA shut that down so they had to find something else to use. Anecdotally, I know a chiropractor who is now making way more money running a 'weight loss gym' than he ever pulled out of his practice.

    March 10, 2011 at 6:23 am | Reply to this comment

  • Adam

    It's absolutely absurd but possibly more absurd is that I know someone that did this. Needless to say he's about as active as a rock and the end effect was nada. Worse still, I doubt he even realizes that it was useless and possibly dangerous - he talked about it as a "positive" experience.

    March 10, 2011 at 6:28 am | Reply to this comment

  • Tony Gentilcore

    @ John: I totally agree. There are a lot of fat people out there, and as such, a lot of money to be made. But, at what expense? Just seems to me that many of these professionals resort to shady, quick fixes rather than actually educate their clients/patients. On an a side, I too, know of a handful of chiro's who have reverted to more of a "weight loss clinic" approach, and NONE of them promote shit like this. Different strokes for different folks, I suppose.

    March 10, 2011 at 6:36 am | Reply to this comment

  • Dean Somerset

    This sounds too similar to Bernsteins plan for comfort. You're absolutely right about rebound. I had a client who tried this out for 4 months, lost 100 pounds, then went on their "maintenance phase," and gained back 80 pounds in the first month. After that her thyroid was fried, she had a heart attack from the stress, developed insulin resistance (not quite diabetic yet), but the company assumes everything went normal and that "she was a statistical anomaly." Complete and utter Bullshit.

    March 10, 2011 at 7:48 am | Reply to this comment

  • Gwen

    I actually know someone who did the HCG diet for 28-30 days. Yeah, she lost weight but she now looks skinny fat and emaciated. She says, "oh my jeans fit so much better now that I've lost weight." I tell her to focus on gaining strength and her reply is a gasply "NO! Then my jeans won't fit anymore!" To each their own...

    March 10, 2011 at 8:06 am | Reply to this comment

  • Lisa V

    “From an anecdotal point of view,” Dr. Bissoon said, “physicians all around the country have seen people losing a tremendous amount of weight with this stuff, and you cannot afford to ignore that.” THE REASON THEY ARE LOSING WEIGHT IS BECAUSE THEY ARE EATING 500 CALORIES A DAY!! And this guy's a doctor??? Sometimes I am amazed at how abslolutely stupid people are. Excuse me while I go throw up.

    March 10, 2011 at 8:13 am | Reply to this comment

  • J B

    So glad to see the return of "morning cup of.." Always a fan favorite. You don't see trainers performing surgery (or in this case putting braces on peoples teeth.. WTF?!!?), why do Doctors think they know how to get people to lose weight? Smaller /= fitter, and at 500 cals/day unless the hormone they're injecting is straight TEST you're just looking at a person who is a smaller version of themselves (aka FAT) Particularly since (as you so aptly pointed out) there is no exercise component to this "plan." This is snake oil at it's lowest, at least the crossfitters and "show you how to use the machines" trainers are at least making an effort. It's enough to make a guy want to drink.

    March 10, 2011 at 8:18 am | Reply to this comment

  • Ray

    Unfortunately, this "diet" perfectly captures an eternal truth that will (a) always keep most people fat and (b) always make hawkers of crappy, get-rich diet schemes wealthy. Exercising right and eating well is damn hard work. There is absolutely no way around it. The minority who actually do it look great; those that don't want badly to look like the minority. As a result, any product, plan, scheme, book, or speech that promises the results of putting in hours/months/years of hard-ass work without actually having to do all of those hard things will always be in demand by the fat majority. Why work hard when you can shake a weight for 10 minutes a day and be ripped? The good news: If all of this stuff worked, those of us who bust our asses working out and eating right wouldn't be so special.

    March 10, 2011 at 8:28 am | Reply to this comment

  • Henock aka Nock

    people in nature rather follow a leader(Doctor) than follow their own instincts and knowledge. This is why these doctors will be able to take advantage of all kinds of people.....smh. It doesn't surprise me doctors have falling this low to actually make extra buck these days b/c people really have lost their common sense. With all these free information that is out there in the web people still don't research and educate themselves before they go through these kinds of crazy treatments.....

    March 10, 2011 at 8:33 am | Reply to this comment

  • Mosley

    You know what's worse than the HCG diet? The fake HCG diet that people are buying into daily where they take HCG "drops" which are not actual HCG but cost the same as the real injections. And yes, only eating 500 calories a day... P.S. My first spam question was "Are rocks heavy or light?" and my answer was, "Depends on the rock..." It didn't like that.

    March 10, 2011 at 8:53 am | Reply to this comment

  • JD

    lol Mosley ;) this article blew my mind , plastic surgeon and an orthodontist wtf . Enjoyed the picture of someone taking the dog for a walk in their SUV.

    March 10, 2011 at 10:11 am | Reply to this comment

  • JD

    lol Mosley ;) this article blew my mind , plastic surgeon and an orthodontist wtf . Enjoyed the picture of someone taking the dog for a walk in their SUV.

    March 10, 2011 at 10:12 am | Reply to this comment

  • Brent

    A sad sign of the times. Unfortunately due to its financial support, Big Pharma will always dominate over the idea of eating real food and lifting heavy things.

    March 10, 2011 at 10:19 am | Reply to this comment

  • natalie

    several comments: (a) it was #1 most emailed on nytimes within hours - I, sadly, doubt this was because everyone thought it was so absurd; (b) what is absolutely WILD to me is that people assume in every which way that if their jeans are smaller they are automatically "healthier". Eating 500 calories a day is JUST as terrible for you as eating 5000 calories a day... it f*@ks up your metabolism and interrupts proper hormone function, not to mention severely distorts the any sort of healthy relationship with food. I'm pretty certain pregnant women secrete a fair amount of HCG in thier urine. People would probably pay to drink it if they thought it would make them skinny. PATENT PENDING.

    March 10, 2011 at 10:52 am | Reply to this comment

  • Brad

    I don't typically snicker at people, but I do when I read stuff like this. I'm down 35 lbs (cut carbs to almost nil except training days), stronger than I've been in many, many years (Show 'n' Go FTW!), and I did it with three hours a week of lifting weights I got for free from the great unwashed who "don't have time to train" (Freecycle is your friend). It is really so simple, people ...

    March 10, 2011 at 12:00 pm | Reply to this comment

  • Sable

    Can this blog be real? Is this an intelligent male encouraging females to train hard and lift heavy? Are you SERIOUS? I am so excited :) And um yes I almost smacked one of my friends for going on this ridiculous thing. For the love of God it's not that complicated -- eat less (but not 1500 calories/day less) than you use, exercise, take the stairs instead of the elevator. NOT rocket science. No fake shots and super low calorie deficits required. Just, ya know, discipline and self-control.

    March 10, 2011 at 12:11 pm | Reply to this comment

  • Tony Gentilcore

    Wow - quite the response today! Glad to see I wasn't the only who felt this was absolutely retarded. @ Brad: Thanks for chiming in and sharing your story. Fantastic work and glad to hear that Show and Go was such a success for you! @ Sabie: Welcome! Hopefully you'll stick around and interact more.

    March 10, 2011 at 5:52 pm | Reply to this comment

  • Greg R

    When do they start pedaling cocaine as a nutritional supplement?

    March 10, 2011 at 6:05 pm | Reply to this comment

  • Mosley

    March 10, 2011 at 6:17 pm | Reply to this comment

  • John M

    It's funny you mention this because we were just talking about it the other day in my Current Issues in Exercise Science class. It really is a shame that the majority of the population is always looking for a quick fix instead of actually putting in the work and doing things the right way. Heaven forbid they give up there daily bagel from Dunkin Donuts, put down the pink dumbbells, and actually lift something heavy. A little discipline goes a long way.

    March 10, 2011 at 8:41 pm | Reply to this comment

  • Brock

    To be honest I'm surprised you just came across this Tony. A former client of mine asked me about this a couple months back, so I looked into it a bit more. It really is quite disturbing what people will resort to to make a boatload of cash.

    March 10, 2011 at 9:20 pm | Reply to this comment

  • Tony Gentilcore

    @ Greg: BRILLIANT!!!!! I'm on it.

    March 11, 2011 at 4:19 am | Reply to this comment

  • Kujo

    I saw this diet on the Dr.Oz show a few weeks back. They had people on that swore by it, and those that had horrible experiences following it. I couldn't believe the retardedness of it all. Dr.Oz was not impressed.

    March 11, 2011 at 11:41 am | Reply to this comment

  • PJ Striet

    Nothing surprises me anymore...realllyyy???? I'm going to talk about this "diet" for my weekly radio bit I do here in the 'nati.

    March 14, 2011 at 4:49 pm | Reply to this comment

  • Meg

    I agree the diet is utter crap. But- people will do anything to get skinny. Well, with the exception of proper nutrition and exercise. I do disagree that 3-5 hours of exercise a week is not sufficient. I have two kids and a full time business. I get my ass out of bed early five days a week to work out. I lift heavy (nrol4w) and focus on eating right and I have seen results. There has to be some balance in life between commitment to health and commitment to work and family. I do my best to find it.

    March 16, 2011 at 7:24 am | Reply to this comment

  • Tony Gentilcore

    @ Meg: Right on, and thanks for chiming in! Totally agree with you, and it just comes down to making it a priority in your life. You know, some people like to prioritize watching American Idol 3x per week and then complain that they never have time to train. Keep rocking on!

    March 16, 2011 at 6:46 pm | Reply to this comment

  • adegbenro

    Makes me feel "embarrassed" to be a doctor.That is one f**ked up regimen.Are they receiving these ideas from creatures on PLUTO ???!!!

    March 19, 2011 at 2:56 am | Reply to this comment

  • LouK

    Thanks for posting this. A client's wife asked me about it today and I was already prepared to give her an authoritative answer and steer her away from this garbage because I was already aware of it.

    March 19, 2011 at 2:07 pm | Reply to this comment

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