I enjoy every podcast I am invited on to, but this one in particular was a delight take part in. The Grafters podcast is hosted by Chris Kershaw and Reanne Francis who are both personal trainers located in Leeds, UK.
In this episode we discuss what it’s been like to navigate the apocalypse (COVID-19) and what I have done to “pivot” my business. In addition we go into some of the mental gymnastics surrounding helping our clients/athletes during this weird, weird time.
We’ve worked on everything from me finally addressing the fact my biological father left me when I was three to my incessant negative self-talk to, I don’t know, Michael Bay deciding to make more than one Transformers movie.
She’s helped me through some shit, to put it mildly.
When we first started working together we met upwards of 1x per week for about a year (OMG was that hard). That was eventually “downgraded” to every other week for a number of years. And now we’re in a nice routine of meeting once per month as a sort of “check-in” on life and other shenanigans.
Truthfully I’ve felt great for awhile now and have questioned whether or not I should even bother continuing on. As tepid as I may be at times, I still consider my therapy session(s) a stand-alone, non-negotiable appointment akin to getting my car’s oil changed every 5,000 miles, or, I don’t know, working out.
In short: It keeps me from wanting to throw my face into a brick wall.
As it happens, my most recent session served as a stark reminder of all of this.
I left the States for Europe on February 26th…just as the Coronavirus had kinda-sorta started to take shape here in the States (and had most certainly entered the day-to-day psyche of the average European).
I spent five days in Athens, Greece (workshop and pleasure).
Two days in Paris, France (pleasure; mostly to eat cheese).
Five days in London (two more workshops and because I’m obsessed with it).
Each day that passed I saw more face masks in public, more people carrying hand sanitizer and keeping their distance, and more general unease.
I flew back to the States on March 10th.
Two days later the US had made the decision to implement travel bans while entire countries had started the process of shutting down completely.
A week after that, a Thursday, was my first therapy session. By then the world had changed (and toilet paper seemingly ceased to exist).
And boy-oh-boy did I unload on my therapist.
The theme was loss:
I “lost” clients.
I “lost” all my workshops scheduled for later in the year.
I “lost” my new gym (I had to renege plans to expand CORE to a larger location).
I “lost” all my pants (I mean, shelter at home advisory = who needs pants?).
After 20-30 minutes I finally gave pause and my therapist, with a reassuring smile, made the time-out sign with her hands.
She said simply:
“You didn’t LOSE anything. Things are just on pause at the moment.”
NOTE: Now, of course, this wasn’t meant to imply there wasn’t substantial suffering and real loss going on the world (then or now). No one, least of all my therapist, was making light of the situation.
That said:
Holy Fuckin A – what a baller re-frame!
Her words punched me in the kidney.
It was exactly what I needed to hear (and something I hope resonates for the bulk of fitness professionals who may be reading).
Like many of you I’ve vacillated between determination, fatalism, ennui, and just trying all I can to clone anything that feels normal.
The health/fitness industry – like many industries – has been decimated in recent weeks.
There’s no sugar coating things.
It’s bad.
Thousands of us have been left to marinate in uncertainty, doubt, and the feeling of inevitable loss.
The unknown.
It’s not fun and it’s going to stick around for a while.
But not forever.
As cheesy and as impossible as it sounds…
…the pause button has been pressed.
What this means for me:
– Checking in and being there for my clients.
In the end I know my clients will come back (or I’ll kill them). It’s important to recognize we’re in the service industry and that we should still serve our clients. This could mean accommodating them with at home workouts of course, but it also could mean nothing more than sending a “hey, how are you doing?” text.1I haven’t lost my clients; the pause button has been pressed.
– Making the pivot to more online & virtual training until social distancing measures are loosened. Who knows: maybe it’ll turn into a more viable and robust revenue stream when all is said and done? I haven’t lost in-person training; the pause button has been pressed.
– Recognizing that I can (and will) reassess expanding my gym at a later point this year. I haven’t lost my new gym; the pause button has been pressed.
– Recognizing 2021 will be an EPIC travel year for workshops. I haven’t lost all my workshops; the pause button has been pressed.
– Finally getting my head out of my ass and watching Ozark on Netflix. No excuses here.I suck.
I figured we could all use a reprieve from the barrage of “at home” exercises and workouts everyone is posting of late.
#COVID19sucksdonkeyballs
My good friend and London based personal trainer, Luke Worthington, released his Core Training Guidebook recently and in light of that wrote up this guest post that takes a bit of a different “take” on the topic.
Luke’s one of the smartest coaches I know and I think you should check it out (not an affiliate link).
Actually, now that I think about it: the timing of this pans out.
You’re all stuck at home and can’t go to the gym.
Everyone wants a core you can cut diamonds with.
Training the core doesn’t require a lot of equipment.
We have known for some time that core training and core control was about so much more than a six pack. But did you know it also plays a role in your mood, how you sleep, and even how you laugh or cry?
It’s generally accepted that movement is good for us on both a mental and a physical level. However, do we know just how closely the two are linked?
Our nervous system has two parts – parasympathetic (rest & digest) that takes care of all our subconscious actions. And sympathetic (fight or flight) that is our reaction to situations around us.
Generally in life we want to spend as much time as we can in a parasympathetic state – because quite simply, its easier!
However, moving from one to the other has just as much to do with how we move, as how we think.
Our neural anatomy isn’t just enclosed in our skull – the sympathetic ganglion (the part of or neurological system that activates sympathetic activity), are actually situated in the thoracic spine. So extending that part of your skeleton (arching your back) actively stimulates them, and therefore creates a sympathetic state. (one of the reasons why we stretch in the morning to wake ourselves up).
Note from TG: Also another “advantage” to powerlifters accentuating the low back arch during their bench press setup?
Moving ourselves into an extension position (also known as ‘scissor’ position) stimulates us, which makes us more alert, more able to exert force, run faster, jump higher, and generally be more ‘alpha’.2 Excellent for when we’re playing sports or fighting for our lives.
However, it also means that recovery, sleep, decision making and empathy are significantly reduced…
Not so good for maintaining relationships and resting – which we also need to do at times!
How Position Feeds This
One of the primary activities we must do in order to stay alive is breathe.
In order to perform this apparently simple activity we have quite a complex array of musculature supporting it. Our primary respiratory muscles are the diaphragm and the intercostal, which drive air in and out of the lungs with the purpose of exchanging gas and essentially stopping us from dying.
Whereas we may assume that inhaling oxygen is the primary cue for breathing – its actually blowing off carbon dioxide.
“A failure to do this results in our system becoming more acidic leading to a state of anxiety, increased sympathetic activity (fight of flight), impaired nerve conduction, restricted blood flow in cerebral cortex (poor decision making), increased phobic dysfunction panic attacks, and fatigue.”
LaghiF, Tobin F. Disorders of respiratory muscles. American Journal of Respiratory and Critical Care Medicine. Vol 168: 10-48 2003
The majority of the ‘good stuff’ in respiration happens in the lower 1/3 of the lungs.
Where the majority of blood vessels are situated.
However, in order for gas exchange to happen adequately here the ribcage and the pelvis have to be in the correct positions.
In simple terms they have to oppose each other – the pelvis in neutral, and the ribcage oriented over the top of it – almost like a cereal bowl with another one upside down on top of it! In coaching parlance we often call this the ‘cannister’ position.
If this doesn’t happen – then gas exchange cannot happen at this part of the chest cavity. But as a pre cursor to life it has to happen somewhere! If its not happening at the bottom, then it will happen at the top, however, in order for this to occur we have to engage additional musculature to help out (think upper back, trapezius, neck) as we need to elevate the upper chest to create space for airflow.
As well as the more direct consequences of creating unwelcome hypertonicity (over activity) in those areas (trapezius trigger points anyone).
This drive to create space in the upper chest requires thoracic extension, which as we know stimulates the sympathetic nervous system, creating a heightened state of anxiety, which in turn causes an increased desire to breathe…. but… we’re in the wrong position to!
This means we drive further into thoracic extension (scissor position), so we further stimulate the sympathetic nervous system and so we go around in a constant feedback loop…
To propagate the situation even further, the chest /neck breather is far less efficient at blowing off excess CO2 than the diaphragmatic breather (simply due to the fewer blood vessels available for gas exchange in the upper parts of the chest).
Not blowing off enough CO2 makes us more acidic, therefore more anxious, therefore having a greater desire to breathe, therefore driving further into thoracic extension
Poor position = poor breathing mechanics = greater level of anxiety.
However it also places us at a greater risk of further mechanical issues.
“In situations where respiratory drive is increased such as stress, disease or physical exercise, the ability of the respiratory muscles to perform their postural tasks is reduced. The presence of respiratory disease is a stronger predictor for lower back pain than other established risk factors”
International Journal of Osteopathic Medicine 12 (2009)
This constant feedback loop is what is occurring on a physiological level when a person suffers from a panic attack or hyperventilation. What they actually need to do is exhale fully, allow their torso to flex, and reducing the mechanical stress on the sympathetic ganglion, blowing off some CO2, restoring PH, and eventually settling back to homeostasis (balance).
When we’re over stimulated, hyperinflated, and unable to moderate our nervous systems – we push the emergency button.
When we cry, we exhale fully, and flex out of scissor position and into cannister.
Not sure if you’ve noticed but you don’t see people cry in an upright, extended position – they restore canister – get themselves neutral, and exhale. This is why we feel better after we do it, and why we often feel tired afterwards, and also why it makes our abs hurt!
Note from TG: All you have to do is watch me watching the ending of Notting Hill and you’ll see what Luke is referring to.
Training our core to resist movement through all three movement planes, whilst in incrementally more challenging positions will help us lift more and do more cool stuff – but it can also just make us better at life.
I’ve joked about the impending “zombie apocalypse” for years now. And while zombies are fake and don’t exist (except they 100% do), what we’re all currently experiencing with the COVID-19 outbreak is very much real and very much scary.
The entire world is being held hostage to the unknown.
At least with zombies you can see them (and run really fast in the other direction or throw an ax at their face).
With this virus, however, we’re just stuck with this invisible inevitability of a dumpster fire. It’s going to affect our lives in every shape, form, and fashion for weeks, months, if not years to come.
The health/fitness industry, like many industries, has been decimated in a matter of days. People have lost their jobs, income, and (sadly) much, much more.
I am not going to sit here and say I’ve figured it all out. My business has taken a hit too in the past week, and there’s no clear path as to when things will return to normal. Nevertheless, I wanted to share some insights and ideas I’ve used and implemented in recent days which I hope will help others.
Maintaining a Sense of Calm and Comfort Amidst the Chaos
1. Be a Leader
I understand this may sound cheesy and a smidge “eye rolley.”
I mean, the real leaders out there are the doctors, nurses, care givers, researchers, and scientists out there who are trying their damndest to circumvent the storm.
Telling someone not to round their back on their deadlift does not a leader make.
I think one of the things that scares people the most given current events is our daily routine(s) have been disrupted:
Schools and daycares are closed.
Concerts, workshops, seminars, conferences, sporting events, hell, sport seasons have been put on pause.
Self distancing and in some cases, shelter-in-place protocols, have been put in place.
We can’t go to the movies or visit our favorite bars and restaurants.
It’s impossible to find toilet paper (huh?) or kale (fuuuuuuuck).
Compound all the above with gyms closing and there’s only so much a person can tolerate…
We have to be a voice of reason and comfort for our clients.
Their fitness is not going to deteriorate.
I’ve reminded several of my clients that both aerobic endurance and maximal strength “stick around” for a fair bit of time.
Much of the research states that the residual training effect – retention of changes induced by systematic workloads beyond a certain time period after cessation of training – for both aerobic endurance and maximal strength hovers in the 30+/- 5 day range.
Meaning, given a drop off in exercise duration/intensity/frequency you can (and most likely will) maintain those physiological and motor abilities for 25-35 days.
Put another way: Unless someone succumbs to a MAJOR case of the “eff its” and decides to do nothing but binge watch Netflix and bathe in Cheetos dust their fitness levels won’t drop off as much as they think.
The body only needs subtle reminders to maintain those qualities. In lieu of lifting “heavy” we can tweak things like tempos, rest periods, drop sets, mechanical advantage sets, pants on, pants off, lots of things.
(Speed/Power, on the other hand, dissipates quickly…to the tune of 5 +/- 3 days. But even this can be maintained with sprints and simple plyo drills like skipping & bounding).
So, just doing that – and reminding clients that all their hard work won’t just disappear – will go a long way in dampening their anxiety.
HOWEVER: It’s imperative as their coach to encourage them to be proactive.
2. The Part Where You Encourage Them to Be Proactive
One of the first things I did was to email my clients to give them my plan and to offer direction/options.
I’m in a bit of a lucky situation in that I train people in a semi-private fashion out of a small studio space. Unlike larger commercial gyms I haven’t had to shut down (yet), but I have taken precautions to practice social distancing:
No more than two clients in at any given time.
All clients are required to wash & sanitize their hands upon arriving, and are encouraged not to train if they feel ill or have a cough or fever.
Workouts are limited to 60 minutes only.
All bars, DBs, KBs, handles, pens, everything will be sanitized between transitioning of clients.
Still, and respectively, 40-50% of my clientele have opted to stay away from the gym altogether.
So the second email I sent was a link to PerformBetter.com who are offering FREE shipping on all online orders.
OG status right there.
I encouraged my clients to pick up, at the very least, some (mini and super) bands in addition to some kettlebells, and told them that between those two things – in addition to basic bodyweight movements – they’d have hundreds of exercises to choose from and to keep them occupied.
To that end, I plan on filming and sending my clients 2-3 “at home” workouts per week that utilize minimal equipment.
Here’s an example I shared on social media the other day:
If there’s ever a time to lead by example it’s now.
3. The Part Where You Encourage Them to Be Proactive (Part II)
I don’t think we’ll see any shortage of coaches uploading at home workouts on social media in the coming weeks/months (thank goodness).
I am flabbergasted at the inventiveness and creativity of my colleagues.
A few resources I’ve been directing people towards are:
Dr. Ryan DeBell’s At Home Movement & Workout Program (it’s free to download, but you have the option to donate $$ if that fills your love tank).
Jen Sinkler’s Lift Weights Faster Daily (you get DAILY emails highlighting workouts that use minimal equipment).
THIS free bodyweight training manual via Jim “Smitty” Smith of Diesel Strength.
Dean Somerset is offering two months of free access to his High Tensile Strength resource (which includes a section on bodyweight training)
Citizen Athletics’ home workout program(s) – HERE.
Anything BJ Gaddour produces – particularly his “Daily BJ” (which is just a brilliant marketing name).
And, honestly, I think going out of your way to check in with your clients via email/texts is an apropos way of doing business.
I’m challenging my clients to send me accountability emails after completing the workouts I send them. One of my clients sent me this message yesterday:
“Workout 1 in the books. I think this will work just fine 🙂 For extra fun, I added some rucksack curls and wore the rucksack during pushups.
Thanks so much for putting this together. Didn’t realize how much it would boost my mood (didn’t even know my mood needed a boost). Excited to keep going on the coming days.
Thanks again.
PS: I miss your biceps (<— added by Tony).”
He even sent me a screen shot of his workout stats:
I want more of this.
ADDENDUM: My good friend, John Rusin, had a nice re-frame regarding this whole fiasco. He reminded everyone that while it’s cool we’re all trying our best to serve our clients and inundate them with at home workouts to perform, we also can’t forget about CONNECTING with them.
He’s encouraging fit pros to just talk with their clients, check in. Another coach, Melanie Redd, suggested making a private group on FaceBook or Slack.com to share ideas on books to read or shows to binge or to just co-hyperventilate into a paper bag (my add, not hers).
In short: Remain human with your clients.
4. Distance Coaching – It’s a Thing…;o)
I’d do this discussion a disservice if I didn’t defer to Jon Goodman, founder of Online Trainer Academy:
“You don’t need to pay for software to start online training. But if you do want to use it, any of them are more than adequate. Google Drive and email is fine too for now. It doesn’t matter what video tool you use either. Skype or Zoom both work. And you can accept payments with PayPal.
There, that answers the 10,000+ questions I got yesterday. I know that this is a change and it’s scary and feels foreign and uncomfortable. Everybody is struggling right now. Nobody really knows what’s going on. We’re all scared.
But I beg you, don’t overthink this. Move fast. Speed is paramount right now. Jump all in and it’ll be fine and you’ll figure it out. I promise.”
5. A Brief Rant on Selling Products During This Time
For starters have some feel and use common sense.
While it’s a very small percentage, I’ve seen some health/fitness professionals (not coincidentally ones they have a vested, financial interest) suggesting certain diets or supplement stacks will slow down, stave off, or altogether silence the Coronavirus.
In short: To say they suck is an insult to sucking.
They’re the worst.
Secondly, I’ve seen a rash of Tweets and IG posts from some fitness professionals reprimanding other fitness professionals for having the audacity of selling their products during this time. I can’t help but think these are the same people who just hate and complain about everything; even kitty cuddles.
From what I’ve seen the vast number selling products are adopting this tone:
“Hey, if you’re going to be stuck inside for the next several weeks you may as well get smarter and earn some CEUs!”
I think it’s a completely fair and ethical approach.
Tossing myself to the pitchforks I’ve not only lost income from clients pressing the pause button on their in-person training, but have also had all my workshops in the coming months cancelled as well.
I know others have it far worse, and I am not looking for a pity party.
I’m going to be okay, but still…
…that’s revenue I won’t be getting back.
Is the expectation that I (and others in a similar predicament) am supposed to offer free services and 100% off codes on all products for the foreseeable future? Am I supposed to renege on the endless hours (and $$) I’ve spent producing these resources?
Am I?
Would you?
Listen, it’s one thing to be a dickhole and market things in a way that’s blatant profiteering (not cool). It’s another thing altogether to make a living (totally cool).
All of this to say: Assuming you’re not the former example…if you’re someone who has products to sell amongst a horde of fitness professionals yearning to kill some time and learn I say…sell away.
Offer payment plans
Give people an option of what they want to pay (you’d be surprised how many will pay more than you think).
Strange times we’re in, and I can appreciate the chaotic and unknown nature of what’s happening in the world is flipping everyone’s day-t0-day musings upside down.
Me and my family are trying our best to make lemonade out of lemons, trying to stay calm, and maintaining as much normalcy as possible. Let’s just say that with Julian’s daycare closed until mid-April there’s a lot more roughhousing, lightsaber battles, and pantless dinners in the Gentilcore household.3
I am in the throes of catching up and updating many of my clients’ at home workouts. To be honest: I’m impressed with how I’ve been able to conjure my inner McGyver:
“I’ve got one resistance band, a mat, a roll of duct tape, and a pair of nunchucks. Can you design a 3x per week program for me?
I want to thank TG.com regular contributor, Shane McLean, for submitting today’s guest post for me.
You’re flicking through a magazine, social media or channel surfing and you come across a man or women (or both) who seem to have it all. They’re good looking and the total package.
And they’re wearing nice clothes (or hardly any at all), nice things and are surrounded by money and opulence. And to rub salt further into the wounds, they’re doing it all at some far-off exotic location.
And because you don’t have any of that, you’re a little jealous.
Or you’ve started your gym journey with all guns blazing. You’re eating right, nailing your workouts and your scale numbers are looking better. Then someone who looks amazing walks past you at the gym.
You look at them and you look at yourself in the mirror and you think ‘I want to look more like that because I look like shit.”
Starting to recognize this game now?
Recently my son nailed five bodyweight chin ups for the first time. And rather than enjoy the moment and recognize his awesome effort, he downplayed his achievement by comparing himself to a classmate who can do more.
He didn’t give himself a pat on the back because he played the comparison game.
It’s Only Natural to Play
It’s human nature to compare ourselves to others.
A man sizes up another man to see if he is bigger or better looking than him. A woman looks at other women to compare how they’re aging; or if they have better (or worse) body parts or shoes or clothes.
But I’m only going by the limited experience I have with the fairer sex.
However, I’m no expert with the comparison game in the outside world but when it comes to the health and fitness universe, it’s more in my wheelhouse. Because me and (some of) my clients have played this game.
But it’s not all bad.
The Good
Motivation to train when everything is going your way, you’re feeling good and you have the time and energy to get after it, is easy.
However, how many days are like that?
There are days when you need a little kickstart and comparing yourself to someone else’s progress and realizing (if you fall short) if they can look great, you can too.
Although you can’t rely on external motivation to always get the job done, the occasional burst helps keep you going when you’re NOT feeling on top of the world.
The Bad
It’s hard to argue against ‘comparison is the thief of joy.’
When you’re making progress with your training and diet, but your results don’t measure up to the person you see in the magazine, on TV or the sexy gym rat, you may feel like a failure, even when it’s not the case.
Robbing yourself of wins and not enjoying the moment and all the progress you’ve made because you’re playing the comparison game is easy to slip into.
However, it’s a deep dangerous hole to fall into and it will suck all the joy out of your current progress. Because if that’s all you do, then it gets ugly.
The Ugly
If you’re constantly comparing your progress in the gym to those around you or your social media feeds and not the person in the mirror then you’re losing sight on how much you’ve achieved.
Because when you’re comparing progress to someone who is more experienced, to a person you don’t know or who maybe was born with better genetics, you’re almost always going to end up on the losing end.
Even when you’re killing it.
What to Do Instead
When I’ve caught myself or my clients playing the comparison game here’s a few tips I use to turn this around:
If you’re on social media and getting sucked down in the deep vortex of comparison, get off your damn phone, tablet or computer and do something constructive, like the dirty dishes in the sink.
Participate in a mind and body activities such as yoga, tai chi or meditation. This helps you to feel whole, centered, grounded, and soothed. And you’ll be off your phone.
Try to make someone’s day and change the world for the better because you’re more than just your appearance
Realize that person has worked hard to get to this point and you still have plenty of hard work ahead of you. So, put your hard hat on and get to work.
When you see someone in the gym who looks awesome, rather than stare and feel like a creeper, go up to them and compliment them on their appearance. And if you ask nicely, they’ll give you some tips to help your progress.
Wrapping Up
Although this game is okay to use for the occasional motivational boost it’s not a great long-term strategy.
But when you find yourself constantly playing this, then finding ways to stop this thought train in your head is essential. Because you should always find joy in your progress.
About the Author
Shane “Balance Guy” McLean, is an A.C.E Certified Personal Trainer working deep in the heart of Louisiana with the gators.
NOTE: This is a blog I originally wrote back in 2017, but I’m repurposing it today because:
It’s really fucking good.
AND
2. It matches well with the release of Psych Skills for Fitness Pros, my wife’s (Dr. Lisa Lewis), latest resource for personal trainers, strength & nutrition coaches, and physical therapists designed to improve their communication and motivational skills.
It too is really fucking good…;o)
This is the last week you’ll be able to purchase it at $100 off the regular price.
My Wish for Female Fitness: Less Talk About Less
“Why should I be fit?”
Ask a male that question and you’ll hear a bevy of terms and phrases ranging from “to get swole and jacked” to “to get swole and ripped.”4
Ask a female that question? Well, the bulk of them will have an entirely different orientation or framing of answers.
Most of the time we’ll see an avalanche of words like:
Lean
Slim
Toned
Thin
In other words: For many women the idea of being fit revolves around being LESS. Rather than embracing and accepting their body as something unique and worthy of its own admiration (regardless of size), many women are fixated on the notion that less is sexier.
Healthier.
Better.
This is in stark contrast to the psyche of their male counterparts. Peruse any magazine rack and you’ll immediately notice a different tone:
Big
Strong
Mass
Gain
Here, the goal is MORE.
My wife, Dr. Lisa Lewis, who speaks on this topic and phenomenon frequently, refers to this as a Growth Orientation.
Woman are (generally) programmed to strive for less. By contrast, men are (generally) programmed to strive for more.5
“Striving to Be More, Instead of Wanting to Be Less”
Rather than being seduced into the rabbit hole of incessant “weight loss,” which, lets be honest, is the quicksand of the industry – slowly swallowing any semblance of enjoyment and fun out of fitness – I’d like to see more women gravitate towards something I refer to as 3×52.
Instead of a goal of weight loss and steady diet of disappointing results (and Paleo recipes that taste like old lady fart sprinkled with sawdust), the ultimate goal, as far as my own female clients, is to get them in the gym 3 days a week, 52 weeks a year…aiming for CONSISTENCY and PERFORMANCE.
I find if I can get them “married” (for lack of a better term) to finally conquering a chin-up, or deadlifting their bodyweight for reps, or, I don’t know, beating Xena Warrior Princess in a street fight, the aesthetic goals they’re chasing (often saturated with a tone of weight loss) just kinda-sorta…happen.
Better yet…they forget about them altogether, and just want to crush weights.
It’s All About Motivation
This is where my wife Lisa would chime in with her expertise, but I’m going to take as stab at it.
In the seminal book, “Intrinsic Motivation and Self-Determination in Exercise and Sport,” a light read (said no one, ever), motivation is described as:
“….[is] an internal state that energizes and drives action and behavior and determines its direction and persistence.”
The fitness industry, as it relates to women (exponentially so), is very much fixated on extrinsic factors: external appearance, sex appeal, being less.
This isn’t entirely wrong or altogether a bad thing. I understand that for many women looking at magazine covers like the one above, or perusing any number of Instagram accounts of fitness celebrities can be motivating.
However, it’s also very superficial.
Happiness, it would seem, is tethered to one’s waistline or ability to look a certain way society (or magazine editors) deems attractive.
This is not healthy.
And, funnily enough: I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard stories and have seen personally people (both men and women) who have sacrificed a lot to look a certain way.
They give up social events and carbs (CARBS!) in pursuit of six-pack abs or tank-top triceps, only to attain the goal and be like, “huh, that’s it? Well, that’s a bunch of bullshit.”
The moral of the story, however, is to help your clients find and recognize INTRINSIC factors that will fuel their motivation to get fit and healthy. And do so long-term.
The difference and power of intrinsic factors is that they have less to do with external appearance and sex appeal and more to do with finding value in other ways, like:
How exercising makes someone feel.
Exercise matches their values and beliefs.
Someone feels exercise is an important part of their personality, and makes them the best version of themselves possible.
You do that – help someone seek intrinsic motivation – and Tracy Anderson will have less of an influence.
This is where being a good, intuitive coach brings value. I’m a strength guy and love the barbell lifts, so it stands to reason I have a little bias towards them.
While I’m at a stage in my career where the majority of women who reach out to me know what they’re getting themselves into – a healthy dose of deadlifts and Tiesto – I also recognize that for some, I can’t force feed anything.
If someone would rather jump into a live volcano than perform a back squat…what good is it to force them to do back squats. That’s a sure-fire way to crush motivation.
It’s my job, then, to do the best I can to match their goals with shit they’ll actually want to do. Maybe instead of back squats we perform Goblet squats, or a crap-ton of sled work?
More to the point, if I can identify their strengths and talents – and utilize things that make them feel like a rock star – we’re in a good place.
A post shared by Tony Gentilcore (@tonygentilcore) on
2. Highlight Ways to Grow
Building autonomy should always be the goal with any client. You should want them to eventually leave.
Listen to a client’s goals and ALWAYS create plans based on those goals…..always. Allow room for goals to change, be modified, or even abandoned. Everything is negotiable.
A large reason why so many people fail to get results – even when working with a trainer – is that the trainer sucks balls. He or she never takes the initiative to provide education and feedback to increase competency in their clients.
I don’t feel there is nefarious intent or that such a thing is done purposely much of the time, but it does speak to the pure laziness of some trainers and coaches.
I know when I start to work with a new client (female or otherwise) I go out of my way to explain everything, why we’re doing a certain exercise, it’s benefits, and why it will help get them closer to their goals.
Moreover, I make sure to meet her where she’s at.
This kinda mirrors what I said above – I.e., not force feeding YOUR preferences onto your clients – but a crucial component of sustained motivation is competency. This is why I rarely have someone – male or female – straight-bar deadlift on Day #1.
Clients want to feel as if they know what the hell they’re doing, that they can do “stuff,” and that they don’t look foolish.
Foolish
Less Foolish
Look, a Demon Kitten (Which Has Nothing to do With Anything)
3. Build Relatedness
Your relationship & rapport with clients is an essential element of success. Be mindful of your clients’ social needs in regard to their fitness.
For example, if you partake in semi-private training as I do, and you’ve just started with a new female client and you know she’s a bit timid and self-conscious…it’s probably not a bright idea to pair her alongside your male client training for his next powerlifting meet.
Another example, especially when training female clients, Beyonce Radio on Pandora is like female relatedness catnip. It never fails.
Never.
Less Talk About Less
Taking all of the above in consideration will, I feel, help with all the “less” talk that permeates female fitness.
No! We want more.
More confidence, more autonomy, more competence, more muscle (because, why not?), more cowbell, more Beyonce.
What burns us out as coaches isn’t sets/reps, breaking down deadlift technique, or writing a metric-shit ton of training programs (although that last one can be debated). No, what grinds our gears are our…
…clients!
They can be inconsistent, unmotivated, drop off the face of the Earth only to show up three weeks later wondering why they’re not getting results, have poor boundaries, smell really bad, any number of things.
All of which require communication skills to deal with.
Creating a long-lasting career in fitness, one that rewards you with loyal clients who stick around, isn’t about how much you lift, how great your butt looks on Instagram, or how much you spend on Facebook for advertising.
It’s about creating a CONNECTION with your clients.
It’s a detour I’ve made in between two weekends of teaching workshops (last weekend in Athens, Greece and this coming weekend in London).
I love it here. I only had one full day at my disposal so I made the most of it. I adore walking around European cities so I coordinated my iPhone with Google Maps and hit up Musee d’Orsay, Louvre (just to see it), Arc du Triomphe, Eiffel Tower (whoa), and Notre Dame.
Not too bad, right? Most of the “big hits.”
Sadly, it’s been a swift 36 hours and it’s time to pack, head to the train station, and take the Chunnel to London.
BUT FIRST…I’M LIKE, REALLY, REALLY IMPORTANT
(Things I’ve appeared in, places I’m going, you know, important stuff)
This is the ONLY resource out there designed specifically for personal trainers, strength & nutrition coaches, physical therapists, athletic trainers, and, I don’t know, bomb sniffing dolphin trainers to accelerate their communication and motivational skills to help their clients’ get results.
What bogs us down as fitness professionals isn’t the nuances of improving scapular upward rotation, bench press technique, or figuring out the optimal sets/reps for someone.
Nope, it’s other people’s shit.
Those clients who are inconsistent, unmotivated, relapse, or altogether quit.
Like it or not, if you’re a coach you ARE utilizing psychology everyday and it’s these “soft skills” of coaching that will help offset burnout.
Study at home at your own pace.
CEUs available.
Learn from an actual doctor (and not some Instagram mindset coach asshat).
Psych Skills for Fitness Pros is on sale NOW through March 18th at $100 off the regular price.
I’m excited to announce that Dr. Lisa Lewis’s brand new resource, Psych Skills for Fit Pros, is now live and ready to purchase/melt people’s brains.
This resource was made specifically to help personal trainers, strength & nutrition coaches, and physical therapists accelerate their clients’ results (and YOUR success) by mastering communication and motivational skills.
I.e., What often separates great coaches from the average ones isn’t so much their ability to break down shoulder assessment, deadlift technique, design the perfect concurrent periodized program, and/or discuss the intricacies of gluconeogenesis – although those are all pretty baller skills to have.
Rather, what really separates the great fit pros from the masses are their SOFT SKILLS of coaching.
Eleven Years In the Making
Full Disclosure: For those unaware, Dr. Lewis is my wife.
See, here’s proof:
We met in 2009 while I was a coach at Cressey Sports Performance and she was finishing up her doctorate in Sports Psychology at Boston University.
It wasn’t long into our relationship when she noticed I had amazing pecs I’d sometimes come home zapped and frustrated.
For starters I’m an introvert through and through and after eight straight hours of coaching athletes and listening to Metallica and Rage Against the Machine I’d want to sequester myself in my Fortress of Solitude with a book whenever I arrived home.
“Hi Babe. How was your day? Bye Babe.”
But too, what drained me the most was the mental gymnastics tethered to keeping certain clients motivated and consistent with their training. I’d come home mad at myself that “so and so wasn’t getting results” and then either start crying in the corner in the fetal position or jump through a pane glass window.
Okay, neither of those happened…but the discontent was real.
Lisa, thankfully, was always more than happy to help talk me through things and provide a “script” or blueprint or lesson plan to take with me back to work to implement with my clients.
After like the 47th time I came home asking her for advice it dawned on me…
…the health/fitness industry NEEDS her and her expertise.
It needs an ACTUAL DOCTOR in this shit (and not some tool on Instagram who labels themself a “mindset coach” because they read a book once) who actually lifts to come up with a resource.
Something to help health/fitness professionals to develop their people skills and to build better rapport with their clients/athletes. I mean, like or not, there’s A LOT of psychology stitched in with being a coach.
The seed was planted.
Now, Fast Forward Moving-In Together, Getting Married, Adopting a Cat, Starting Our Own Separate Businesses, and Having a Kid.
Lisa started officially working on this project in April 2019.
We all have clients who are noncompliant, dropout, relapse, or just straight up give-up on their health/fitness goals.
And it really grinds our gears.
Psych Skills for Fitness Pros addresses a gap in the nutrition and exercise science knowledge base – psychology. This online, do-at-your-own-pace course provides an introduction, theoretical review, and extensive application of psychological processes that are central to working with clients.
The course is divided into 6 chapters, and each chapter contains 4-6 modules of content. These modules include webinars, quizzes, interviews, and worksheets for self-reflection and practice. Specifically, the course content includes the Self-Determination Theory, the Transtheoretical Model of Change, and Motivational Interviewing.
Of Note: the interviews include some names you might be familiar with (and how they used these very skills to help build their businesses and brands): Mark Fisher, Molly Galbraith, Dean Somerset, Meghan Callaway, Kelly Coffey, Georgie Fear, and some jallopy with the last name Gentilcore.
This product is ON SALE at 20% off the regular price today though the next two weeks.
What Else Can You Expect?
Continuing Education credits have been approved via the NSCA (and NASM is pending)
You have the option to either purchase in full or take advantage of a payment plan.
Gluten free.
There’s no other resource out there like this specifically designed for trainers and coaches.
