In our great nation’s history, there have been several lawsuits that have had a great impact on our society and have affected millions of lives. A few that come to mind (thank you Wikipedia)

Roe vs. Wade (is a controversial United States Supreme Court case that resulted in a landmark decision regarding abortion).

Brown vs. Board of Education (was a landmark decision of the United States Supreme Court, which overturned earlier rulings going back to Plessy v. Ferguson in 1896, by declaring that state laws that established separate public schools for black and white students denied black children equal educational opportunities. As a result, de jure racial segregation was ruled a violation of the Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment of the United States Constitution).

Gentilcore vs. Megan Fox (still under ruling by the United States Supreme Court, whereupon it would be illegal for Ms. Fox to show her fun bags/face pillows/BOOBIES!!!! to anyone other than myself.)

And now, we have Sugarman vs. Carter, which will undoubtedly be remembered as a turning point in the American justice system.

From The New York Times:

Last month, a jury acquitted Mr. Christopher Carter of assault charges for manhandling the stationary bike of a fellow gym member, Stuart Sugarman, who was shouting and grunting during a spin class. Even though Mr. Carter’s defense lawyer acknowledged in court that his client had grabbed Mr. Sugarman’s bike by the handlebars, tilted it back and then released it, with Mr. Sugarman astride, the jury decided that he was not a criminal for having done so.

The altercation occurred at an Equinox fitness club on the Upper East Side last August. Mr. Sugarman, a 49-year-old senior partner at an investment firm, was yelling things like “You go, girl!” and “Good burn!” in spin class, and Mr. Carter could not take it anymore. He twice asked the instructors to get Mr. Sugarman to quiet down, according to trial testimony. But after Mr. Sugarman continued, harsh words were exchanged.

Mr. Carter, 45, a stockbroker, stormed over to Mr. Sugarman’s bike and lifted it, crashing the back of it into a wall, witnesses said. Mr. Sugarman said the force of the bike dropping to the ground caused a herniated disc in his neck.

Christopher Carter is officially my new hero. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure this qualifies him for the National Medal of Honor, or I don’t know, at least a high five. Maybe a free dinner at KFC? Regardless, the man did us all a favor and he should be commended for it. However, I have to say that if I were in the same situation, I probably would have skipped the whole “harsh words being exchanged” thing, and just gone right to throwing this Sugarman guy (and his bike) out the window. 47th floor be damned. There you have it folks, case closed.

But this whole story does bring up a conundrum. Namely, what other annoying things do people do in the gym that warrants such justified behavior? For the heck of it, I made an informal list which I’m pretty sure will be made into an Amendment:

1. Guy who yells “all you, all you, all you,” while essentially doing an upright row for the person he’s spotting.

1.2. Guy who loads the bar to 225 and says he’s going for five reps and then barely gets one. He then looks at you with a look of bewilderment, shrugs, and says, “yeah, I trained my triceps yesterday, so I’m pretty tired today.”

1.3. Guy who claims he used to bench 400 lbs back in high school. It’s amazing how often this happens. I’ve been around some REALLY strong guys and I’ve only seen a handful bench over 400 lbs. Yet, every Tom, Dick, and Harry claims he used to bench 400 lbs for reps back in high school.

2. Guy (or girl) who flexes in front of the mirror after each set of bicep curls. Bonus points for actually kissing your bicep or muttering, “yeah, I’m so swole” afterwards.

3. Girl who wears sunglasses while she trains. I saw this a lot while I was a trainer in downtown Boston and always thought it was borderline retarded.

4. Guy who walks into the gym with a sweatshirt on and then proceeds to strip down every ten minutes in this order: sweatshirt…long sleeved shirt…sleeveless shirt/wife beater/UnderArmour shirt.

5. Anyone who talks on their cell phone while “working out.” Matter of fact, at CP we don’t even allow cell phones into the facility. This is the sign that greets all our athletes/clients before they step onto the gym floor.

So lets have it people. What other stupid things do people do in the gym that annoy you?