November Archives

Haven’t done one of these in a few weeks, so lets get right to it.

1. Blanket Statement of the Week (courtesy of some random nutrition professor that I don’t know): “excess protein will be turned to fat.” A little back story. A friend of mine’s brother is in school. He’s taking a nutrition class. His teachers says that there is no need for anyone to go above the ADA’s recommendation of 0.8 grams of protein per kg of body weight, because any excess protein will just be turned to fat. Really? And here I thought it was excess calories that make people fat?

Some quick facts:

It’s pretty well established in current research that 0.8 grams of protein/kg (particularly for active individuals) is woefully low. I’m 200 lbs and need far more than 72 grams of protein per day to keep chicks wanting to hang out with me. Come on.

Also, compared to carbohydrates and fats, protein has a higher TEF (Thermic Effect of Feeding) and must to go through a rather extensive process in order to be broken down (cue sciencey stuff that I really don’t want to elaborate on here), and as such, is actually the hardest macronutrient to be able to “convert into fat.”

I don’t know, this professor might have just trumped Trainer McMakeShitUp as being #1 on my list of people most deserving of getting punched in the face. With a brick.

2. My colleague, Brian St. Pierre started his own blog not too long ago, and I encourage all of you to check it out here. Brian is a very bright guy* who happens to take care of the bulk of nutrition consultations at Cressey Performance. Furthermore, you will all appreciate his no-nonsense approach to telling it like it is. Read: he swears when he’s angry! Don’t believe me, read his post on The Non-Awesomeness of MSN Health Tips. Trust me, if there’s one thing I’ve learned is that you don’t make Brian St. Pierre angry. He’ll eat your babies. True story

3. In the past, I’ve stated that I’d much prefer to make plank variations “harder” or more challenging than to increase time. Here’s a great variation of the side plank that we’ve started to incorporate at CP called the side plank wall slide.

The objective here is to place your head, shoulders, butt, and heels up against the wall and to stay as “stiff” as possible. Don’t let your hips sag and try to keep all points of contact ON THE WALL throughout the duration of the exercise. Try for three sets of eight to ten reps on each side. They’re harder than they look!

4 It’s been brought to my attention (Nel) that apparently it upsets some of my female readers that I include so many pictures of hot chicks being hot on my blog. So to appease you (Nel), I decided I would include a picture of one of my man-crushes and current Sexiest Man Alive, Hugh Jackman. Why do I have a man-crush on Hugh? He’s freakin Wolverine. Nuff said. However, just for the record, my abs would totally kick his abs’ ass.

5. This is a recipe that I got from Jen Heath for protein pancakes, and they’re absolutely delish.

1.5 cups cottage cheese

2 cups oats

12 egg whites

2 scoops vanilla Low Carb Metabolic Drive

cup water

cinnamon (quite a bit)

Just put all the contents into a blender and “blend” them till they’re a consistent texture. Obviously the recipe above will make roughly twelve pancakes (which can be used for breakfast and/or snacks), so feel free to half the ingredients if you choose to do so.

* = engaged at 24. Not so bright in my book. Freakin idiot. Oh, hey Anna (Brian’s fiance), what’s up? I didn’t realize you were there. What’s with the rabid German Shepard? Wow, he looks mean. Wait, what are you doing? Don’t let him off his chain. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

UPDATE (from my hospital bed): Brian and Anna = true love forever. It’s a beautiful thing.

Earlier this week I picked up Malcolm Gladwell’s new book, Outliers: The Story of Success,and all I have to say is wow. I cannot put it down. For those who aren’t familiar with Gladwell, he also penned the books The Tipping Point and Blink, which also happen to be two amazing reads.

In Outliers, the premise is simple: Why do some people succeed far more than others? Gladwell argues that (this is taken directly from the inside flap) if we want to understand how some people thrive, we should spend more time looking around them — at such things as their family, their birthplace, or even their birth date. The story of success is more complex — and a lot more interesting — than it initially appears.

Gladwell dedicates an entire chapter to what he calls the “10,000 Hour Rule.” In that chapter he asks a very simple question: is there such a thing as innate talent? Which is to say, are there some people out there who are just naturally gifted and just float by effortlessly to the top of their chosen field/hobby/sport/what-have-you? The obvious answer is, yes. However, in typical Gladwell fashion, he digs a little deeper.

Gladwell points out that the problem with this view (natural talent) is that the closer psychologists look at the careers of the gifted, the smaller the role innate talent seems to play and the bigger role preparation seems to play. Gladwell notes:

“The idea that excellence at performing a complex task requires a critical minimum level of practice surfaces again and again in studies of expertise. In fact, researchers have settled on what they believe is the magic number for true expertise: ten thousand hours.”

What separates elite violinists from “good” violinists to those who only end up music teachers? Practice. 10,000 hours to be exact. Why is Bill Gates able to take baths in hundred dollar bills? He spent hours upon hours (hello, 10,000) honing is computer programming skills as a high school student.

The point is, if you want to be great in anything, you’re not just going to get by with talent alone. You want to become a great trainer/coach? You have to attend seminars, network, and read more than two books. Sadly, I remember a conversation I had with a trainer when I worked at Sports Club/LA who mentioned to me that he had already learned all he needed to know about fitness. What a walking bag of douche.

I can’t help but think about what Dave Tate always says about achieving success in anything. You have four categories: shit………………suck……………….good……………….great. Whether your goal is be the best trainer you can be, deadlift 500 lbs, or perfect your squat technique, the common denominator between each category is time (10,000 hours). Which begs the question, what have I spent 10,000 hours doing that would label me an expert? Lets see, um…..

1. Playing Stratego with my Lord of the Rings action figures

2. Watching Star Wars alone on a Friday night

3. Looking up images of Padma Lakshmi

4. Not getting laid. Weird, I know!

Long story short, I trained at Hell-on-Earth Bally Total Fitness over the weekend, and in doing so, it reminded me just how lucky I am that I train at my own facility. You can only imagine all the things I saw that made me want to light my face on fire while I was there: the 6-3, 150 lb guy performing squats on a BOSU ball, the trainer taking his overweight female client through a series of “hip circles” followed by the seated ADD/AB-duction machines, and lets not forget all the dudes who walked around with their invisible water jugs between their arms (otherwise known as ILS: Inflated Lat Syndrome).

All that being said, nothing was more cringe worthy than all the people I saw performing endless repetitions of sit-ups as part of their workout. It still amazes me that people think there is any benefit to performing them. To be honest, I can think of a host of other things that would be more beneficial:

1. Cirrhosis of the liver

2. A nuclear holocaust

3. Four more years of Bush

4. Getting kicked in the balls, repeatedly

5. Another Sex and the City movie

I haven’t programmed a “sit-up” for any of my clients in well over three years, and they’re essentially banned from Cressey Performance. In the past, I’ve explained why I’m not a fan of sit-ups/crunches, so I won’t belabor the point here. Cliff Notes version (professional explanation): when one performs a sit-up and/or crunch, they’re essentially pulling the sternum closer to the pelvis hundreds, if not thousands of times, promoting a kyphotic posture (rounded back). Cliff Notes version (my explanation): they suck.

Furthermore, in Low Back Disorders: Evidence-based Prevention and Rehabilitation, Dr. Stuart McGill notes that the traditional sit-up imposes approximately 3300 N (about 730 lb) of compression on the spine. Incidentally, the National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health (NIOSH) has set the action limit for low back compression at 3300 N; repetitive loading above this level is linked with higher injury rates in workers, yet this is imposed on the spine with each repetition of the sit-up! Hello people?!?!?!?! Stop doing freakin sit-ups, for the love of all that is holy.

I am so conflicted today. If you’re a regular reader of my blog, you know that when it comes to women and fitness I hate buzz words like tone, sculpt, or anything to do with Tracy Anderson. Moreover, the whole idea that women are these delicate creatures that shouldn’t lift anything more than a pink dumbbell (for fear of getting big and bulky) is just plain absurd in my opinion.

That being said, under normal circumstances what I am about to show you would typically make me want to slam heroine directly into my eyes. But dammit, I have a penis and sometimes I have to give credit when credit is due.

*CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP. Tear rolls down cheek. CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP. So confused. CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP. Doesn’t this do nothing but glorify women as sex objects? CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP. And come on, are they serious that they think this is a bonafide way to improve strength? CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP. All someone needs is a chair and a reason to tap into their inner slut to lose fat? CLAP CLAP CLAP. I think kitchen chairs are on sale at Target this week. CLAP CLAP. Which means Christmas shopping is so done. CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP. Who says I don’t understand women? CLAP CLAP *throws rose onto stage* CLAP CLAP. Encore, encore!

Q: I am having issues with my deadlift. No matter what I do it seems that I can never get my deadlift to 400 lbs and above (which is embarrassing). Currently, I am using your Rule of 90 Percent article and finding great gains in everything but the deadlift. Do you have any suggestions or a program that could help with my numbers? Thanks

A: I like lists, so for the sake of simplicity I’m just going to spew out some random thoughts in no particular order concerning this issue.

Side Note: Before I begin, just know that there are far worse things to be embarrassed about than not having a 400 lb deadlift. For instance, take this guy who is currently performing during open mic night here at the local Starbucks*. I don’t know whether I’m listening to a human being attempt to sing or listening to two whales try to rape each other. It’s a toss up.

1. How long have you actually been training (the right way)? Both Eric Cressey and myself have hit on this point before, but it bares repeating. Any healthy male under the age of 50 can (and should) be able to deadlift at least 400 lbs within two years of proper training.

I’m going to assume you’re under the age of 50 and that you’re “healthy.” So all that’s left to ask is whether or not you’ve been training properly given your goals. Can you look at the past two years of your training and honestly say that you’ve been doing everything right? Read: not being the guy who has a dedicated arm or rhombizoid** day? If not, then you have to be patient. It definitely sounds like you’re headed in the right direction. It’s just going to take time and some hard work. You’ll get there

2. Footware (or lack thereof). I hit on this point last week, but in a nutshell you should be deadlifting either barefoot or in Chuck Taylors. Click on the link if you don’t know why. It may or may not lead to free porn. It’s the risk you’re just going to have to take.

3. Leverages. Depending on your leverages, you may need to tweak your training so that you’re not working against your body.

For instance, those with a long torso and short limbs are going to be at a mechanical disadvantage for deadlifting. If this is you, then it stands to reason that you may have a hard time getting the bar off the floor. If that’s the case then a healthy dose of SUMO deadlifts (14% less ROM with this version) and speed pulls from a deficit are in order.

Conversely, those at the opposite end of the spectrum (short torso, long limbs), are typically well suited for the deadlift. In this case, most tend to stall out about one-half to two-thirds of the way up. Speed pulls (preferablywith some accommodating resistance; ie chains) and lots of glute activation work are in order here.

Additionally, for the long limbed lifter, I wouldn’t be opposed to adding in some heavy rack pulls in their programming as well. I know some people think there’s no carry-over to the deadlift, but I disagree. I have big arms, so I obviously I know what I’m talking about.

Moreover, regardless of which body type you are, don’t neglect the posterior chain. There are a plethora of exercises you can implement that will undoubtedly help improve your deadlift (pull-throughs, glute ham raises, single leg work, etc). Personally I have found that when I include goodmornings into my programming, my deadlift skyrockets.

4. Hot Chicks. And if all else fails, spend a good ten minutes looking at pictures of Italian actress Laura Torrisi.

If your t-levels don’t soar and you don’t beat your PR by at least 20 lbs afterwards, blame your penis and send that little booger to its room with no supper. And that means no X-box mister! I want you to think about what you’ve done. *slams door*

*Alright yes, I hang out at Starbucks occasionally when I want to get some writing done. Whatever. Just for the record, I’m not a coffee snob (I don’t even drink it), but I like to use the free WiFi and hang out in the lounge area. Which is to say there are a lot of hot Asian chicks.

**Note to the retarded guy who will e-mail to let me know there is no such thing as a rhombizoid. You’re a retard.

1. I was perusing a back issue of Men’s Health the other day and came across a section titled “Guy List.” In this particular issue the list described “15 Must-See Sights,” and one in particular caught my attention.

A Predator in Midhunt: a fox will stare motionlessly at a mouse den for many minutes, just to bring dinner home. Shouldn’t you put more effort into your meals than choosing a number 3? Takeout is not a survival strategy, it’s a slow passage to death and laziness.

I couldn’t agree more with the above sentiment. It never ceases to amaze me how lazy people are when it comes to their nutrition. They’ll be meticulous about changing their car’s oil every 3000 miles and only using high grade gasoline to enhance its performance; yet many won’t think twice about the fuel they put into their own body. Weird.

If time is an issue, get up earlier in the morning to prepare your meals. If you’re in your car all day, buy a small cooler and store your food. If you’re stuck in an office all day, do what I do and go kill a deer on your lunch break and make your own venison jerky to bring to work. Quit making excuses and get it done.

2. We made our interns dress up for Halloween, cause we’re a-holes like that. Originally we wanted both Kevin and Chris to dress up as the Ambiguously Gay Duo (Ace and Gary), but figured that may come across as a bit overboard. So obviously the next best option was to dress Kevin up as a Hooters chick, which basically gave me nightmares for the past three days.

3. Also, this is just a personal message to Jen from the Saugus, MA Hooters located on Rt. 1 (where Pete and I drove to the night beforehand get Kevin’s Hooters outfit).

Dearest Jen,

First off, I just want to say the Cobb salad that I ordered was absolutely delicious. I would expect nothing more from such a well regarded establishment. Personally I would have added a bit more chicken, but whatever. Anyways Jen, you weren’t my waitress, and we actually didn’t speak to one another. However, I’m preeeetty sure you wanted me. I saw how you were looking at me as you were taking those nachos to table four. You looked really, um, smart in that pink whatchamacallit outfit. Except replace “smart” with OMG boobies!!!! If you ever want to get together to discuss menu options, glute medius function and how it relates to anterior knee pain, or I don’t know, kittens, just e-mail me at [email protected]. TTYS. XOXOXOXO.

Tony

3. Now let me preface this by saying that I have nothing against fat loss programs. There are plenty of programs out there that I like and I have used several with great success with various clients of mine. That being said, I’m so sick of people doing fat loss programs for months on end. Granted we’re in the midst of an obesity pandemic, and I understand that fat loss programs are a necessity for many people. However, I’m sorry, there are times where I feel they’re overrated and people place too much emphasis on them. I touched on this in my training log last week, but here’s my take:

*Lift heavy shit

*Don’t eat like an asshat

*Throw in some intervals or energy system work

*Repeat

I should write an e-book.

4. It seems a week never goes by where I don’t receive an e-mail from someone complaining about back pain. Oftentimes they will tell me that despite using an “ergonomically friendly” chair, they still suffer from persistent back ache. Truth be told, there is no such thing as one best posture for the lumbar spine. The best posture is one that is always changing.

Since many of you are sitting there reading this post at work, feel free to place your feet on your desk. I’m sure you’re boss won’t mind.

5. I’m hereby boycotting any dude who tries to friend me on Facebook who has a shirtless picture of himself as his profile picture. First off, it’s lame. Unless your name is Jessica Alba of course. Secondly, that barbed wire tattoo across your arm is kinda douchebaggy. And lets be honest, you’re not that ripped in the first place.

6. Normally, arguing with a pilates instructor over the internet is about as exciting as playing Marco Polo with Helen Keller, but I’ll play along and make this short and sweet. For the love of god, pilates DOES NOT lengthen (or elongate) your muscles.

Correct me if I’m wrong (and I’m not), a muscle’s length is dependent on it’s origin and insertion along the bone. We can’t make bones longer (I’ll refrain from the obvious joke here), so it’s physiologically impossible to make a muscle longer beyond their given origin and insertion points. I really wish this myth would just shut up and die.